Jealousy in Relationships
Jealousy in relationships is one of those things that we just can't seem to agree on. Is it bad or good? Some people think it is bad and it should be avoided at all costs while others think that it is good and is a demonstration of how deeply you care for your partner. What do you think; is jealousy in relationships good or bad? When I ponder over it I get the feeling that jealousy is neither bad nor good. It seems to me that it becomes either bad or good depending on the way that you handle it. So what are some key steps in handling jealousy so that it makes your relationship better?
1. Admit it. Truth be told, many of us do not want to admit jealousy in relationships as it makes us feel vulnerable. If we admit it to ourselves that we are jealous then doesn't it mean that we care more deeply for our partner then we care to admit? That may be the truth that you don't want to face but it is your truth...face it! Burying it away or pretending that it doesn't exist is a lie and if you suppress it long enough it will come out in inappropriate behavior or speech that is way more embarrassing then if you had simply admitted it to yourself.
2. Analyze it. What is your jealousy based on? Is it based on something real or are you just insecure? Sometimes you may be jealous because of all the things that you imagine in your mind or it may be because there is a real reason for the jealousy. Is there a real reason for the jealousy? Think about it so that you can try to separate your insecurities from reality. To help you sieve out your issues take an honest look into your past relationships...do you see a pattern of jealousy? If there is then the problem may lie with you and not your partner.
3. Deal with it. How you do this will of course depend on the basis of your jealousy, the type of relationship that you have and the scale of the jealousy that you feel. If your jealousy is based on your insecurities then you need to find a way to deal with those...and get help if you need it. If on the other hand your jealousy is because your partner's behavior is inappropriate then you need to let them know what specific things in their behavior/attitude bother you. If your relationship is fairly new and you feel a slight pang of jealousy when your partner seems interested in someone else, you may need to find a way to deal with it so that your partner doesn't think your psycho. Think of ways to let them know in subtle ways what you feel without reading them the riot act. You want them to know what you feel so that they know your relationship barriers. This will help you gauge their level of care for you and if they care and respect you enough to value your relationship barriers. If your partner thinks that you are being silly then your relationship may not have much of a future since what you feel is real to you and your partner should make some effort to make you more comfortable in the relationship.
Jealousy in relationships has a way of sneaking up on many of us but if you follow these 3 steps then you are on your way to dealing with the jealousy and using it to define for you and your partner the relationship barriers that you need to negotiate.
If however you have problems communicating your jealousy to your partner so that even your genuine feelings of jealousy get misinterpreted then I highly recommend these relationship insights to help you really see and understand what it is that you are doing wrong and how you can change it.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rosy_Anderson
1. Admit it. Truth be told, many of us do not want to admit jealousy in relationships as it makes us feel vulnerable. If we admit it to ourselves that we are jealous then doesn't it mean that we care more deeply for our partner then we care to admit? That may be the truth that you don't want to face but it is your truth...face it! Burying it away or pretending that it doesn't exist is a lie and if you suppress it long enough it will come out in inappropriate behavior or speech that is way more embarrassing then if you had simply admitted it to yourself.
2. Analyze it. What is your jealousy based on? Is it based on something real or are you just insecure? Sometimes you may be jealous because of all the things that you imagine in your mind or it may be because there is a real reason for the jealousy. Is there a real reason for the jealousy? Think about it so that you can try to separate your insecurities from reality. To help you sieve out your issues take an honest look into your past relationships...do you see a pattern of jealousy? If there is then the problem may lie with you and not your partner.
3. Deal with it. How you do this will of course depend on the basis of your jealousy, the type of relationship that you have and the scale of the jealousy that you feel. If your jealousy is based on your insecurities then you need to find a way to deal with those...and get help if you need it. If on the other hand your jealousy is because your partner's behavior is inappropriate then you need to let them know what specific things in their behavior/attitude bother you. If your relationship is fairly new and you feel a slight pang of jealousy when your partner seems interested in someone else, you may need to find a way to deal with it so that your partner doesn't think your psycho. Think of ways to let them know in subtle ways what you feel without reading them the riot act. You want them to know what you feel so that they know your relationship barriers. This will help you gauge their level of care for you and if they care and respect you enough to value your relationship barriers. If your partner thinks that you are being silly then your relationship may not have much of a future since what you feel is real to you and your partner should make some effort to make you more comfortable in the relationship.
Jealousy in relationships has a way of sneaking up on many of us but if you follow these 3 steps then you are on your way to dealing with the jealousy and using it to define for you and your partner the relationship barriers that you need to negotiate.
If however you have problems communicating your jealousy to your partner so that even your genuine feelings of jealousy get misinterpreted then I highly recommend these relationship insights to help you really see and understand what it is that you are doing wrong and how you can change it.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rosy_Anderson
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